Old Souls Study Guide 6: On Comfort

For Individual Reflection and Spiritual Aging Support Group Leaders

Welcome to this month’s  Old Souls Study Guide. Each post in this 9 part series stands on its own so if you are new, you can join in here or visit the archives to start with Post One: On Paradox to work at your own pace individually or with a group.

Personal Note: Spiritual Aging Study and Support Groups (SASS) are springing up internationally using my books and this study guide to inspire the conversation. It’s not too late to join in. Find out how HERE.

This Month’s Excerpt

“I did not expect to find myself to be a sensualist at my age. But in the truest sense of the word—scent, sight, taste, hearing, and touch—I am more keenly honed than ever…

I used to be restless, ambitious, acquisitive. When there were prizes to be awarded, banquets, fireworks, I wanted to be there. Didn’t want to miss out. However, I already know these things. I’ve already had plenty. But to sit quietly enjoying the smooth feel of the yellow pad in my hands: I am in no hurry to write.”

                                           Older, Wiser, Fiercer, “The Senses” pp. 26-28                        

Questions for Journaling or Discussion

·       In the past, which tended to have the stronger pull on you? Using your mind and capacity to get things done or to rest quietly in the present moment allowing your senses to give you pleasure?

·        What delights you?

·       Has growing older afforded you more opportunity to treat your senses with generosity—or is there something blocking you?

·       When you allow yourself to pamper yourself with self-nurturing, are you more or less prone to regret the past or fear the future?

Carol’s  Commentary

I admit that I lived most of my life in my head. As a scholar and writer, it is often more productive to be disembodied—writing about the senses rather than experiencing them. But with the receding of ambition and the unexpected gift of free time, growing old has created the space for discovery. I’ve really gotten into tea—the more exotic, the better. I now know what my favorite scent is (Jasmine) and how much I love soft cotton sheets. This is an experience of sensuality that compensates for that which has been lost as I’ve aged—at least mostly. I now value creature comfort as an end in itself. For this lifelong seeker, there has at last been moments of arrival.

A Spiritual Aging Exercise

To find the cutting edge of your own growth, and to assist in your discernment, try this exercise.

1.)    Take a moment to experience yourself in the present moment. Are you in a comfortable position? Do you love what you’re wearing? What do you smell? What do you hear? Are you infused with an air of contentment actively savoring life?

2.)    If not, take the next opportunity to create the optimum environment for sheer delight. Start by redressing yourself from your undergarments up with your favorite, most comfortable clothes. What sounds would you most like to be hearing—perhaps Japanese flute music or a recording of spring rain? What would you like to smell? A favorite scented candle? Your special perfume? Now make your way to your favorite place to sit. Adjust the lighting just right. Could you use a pillow or comforter? Now ask yourself once again: Am I infused with an air of contentment, savoring life?

Next Month

In Week Seven of the Spiritual Aging Study Guide we turn our attention to the difference between letting go and giving up. If you would like to read ahead, we will be reflecting upon the section “Three Octogenarians” in  Older, Wiser, Fiercer,, pp. 28-29.

The study guides we’re working with through 2024 are based on readings taken from my best-selling book Older, Wiser, Fiercer. Purchase of the book is optional as the monthly guides stand on their own. In 2025, the study guides go weekly and the focus will move from Older, Wiser, Fiercer to weekly readings from my new book Spiritual Aging: Weekly Reflections for Embracing Life. (Inner Traditions, December 10, 2024.)